Caleb Wilde

Caleb Wilde

(218 comments, 980 posts)

I'm a sixth generation funeral director. I have a grad degree in Missional Theology and a Certification in Thanatology.

And I like to read and write.

Connect with my writing and book plans by "liking" me on facebook. And keep tabs with my blog via subscription or twitter.

Posts by Caleb Wilde

The Story Behind This Stone

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Technical Sergeant Leonard P. Matlovich (July 6, 1943 – June 22, 1988)[1] was a Vietnam War veteran, race relations instructor, and recipient of the Purple Heart and the Bronze Star.[2]

Matlovich was the first gay service member to purposely out himself to the military to fight their ban on gays, and perhaps the best-known gay man in America in the 1970s next to Harvey Milk. His fight to stay in the United States Air Force after coming out of the closet became a cause célèbre around which the gay community rallied. His case resulted in articles in newspapers and magazines throughout the country, numerous television interviews, and a television movie on NBC. His photograph appeared on the cover of the September 8, 1975, issue of Time magazine, making him a symbol for thousands of gay and lesbian servicemembers and gay people generally.[3][4][5][6] Matlovich was the first openly gay person to appear on the cover of a U.S. newsmagazine.[7] According to author Randy Shilts, “It marked the first time the young gay movement had made the cover of a major newsweekly. To a movement still struggling for legitimacy, the event was a major turning point.” [8] In October 2006, Matlovich was honored by LGBT History Month as a leader in the history of the LGBT community.  VIA WIKIPEDIA

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Despite his deteriorating health, he tearfully made his last public speech on May 7, 1988 in front of the California State Capitol during the March on Sacramento for Gay and Lesbian Rights:

…And I want you to look at the flag, our rainbow flag, and I want you to look at it with pride in your heart, because we too have a dream. And what is our dream? Ours is more than an American dream. It’s a universal dream. Because in South Africa, we’re black and white, and in Northern Ireland, we’re Protestant and Catholic, and in Israel we’re Jew and Muslim. And our mission is to reach out and teach people to love, and not to hate. And you know the reality of the situation is that before we as an individual meet, the only thing we have in common is our sexuality. And in the AIDS crisis – and I have AIDS – and in the AIDS crisis, if there is any one word that describes our community’s reaction to AIDS, that word is love, love, love.

 

 

Can You Guess What’s in the Box?

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This is Benito, the mail carrier for the Co-op Funeral Home of People’s Memorial

 This photo was originally taken by The Co-op Funeral Home of People’s Memorial

Yup.  You can ship Grandma’s cremated remains through the US Postal Service.  FedEx and UPS won’t take them, but the good ‘ol USPS will take ’em express.

Here’s the link that explains “How to Package and Ship Cremated Remains.”

Sharing in the Grief of Stillbirth through Photography

This from Love Song Events and Photography:

WARNING- these images are extremely emotional. The family wishes for these to be shared in their child’s memory.  This death was EXTREMELY unexpected and tragic. I am asking you all for your prayers. Emily (the mother) will be released from the hospital today and have to go home to a house full of baby items. She will have to walk into her daughter’s nursery and relive this nightmare for the rest of her life. Please stop and pray for them. I said on Friday, “No matter what anybody says about grief and about time healing all wounds, the truth is, there are certain sorrows that never fade away until the heart stops beating and the last breath is taken.” And I meant that. NO FAMILY deserves this unbearable pain. The Staley’s rest assured knowing they will be reunited with their sweet baby girl one day soon, but until that day comes they struggle thinking life will ever have some normalcy. They would like their story to be shared; they hope to bring comfort to other families out there that have also experienced such tragedy. They want their daughter’s life to be remembered. 

Here are the pictures of the Staley family and their daughter Monroe Faith from Love Song Events and Photography

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The Saddest Cemetery in the World

Cross Bones Graveyard in south London became known as the “single-woman’s” cemetery because of the high concentration of prostitutes, dubbed “single-women” or “Winchester Geese.” Since these women of ill-repute could not be given a Christian burial, Cross Bones became an unofficial dumping ground for them and other poor people living in squalor outside of London.

 

Closed in 1853, it was estimated that 15,000 people were buried in the cemetery, the majority prostitutes. A modern excavation done in the 1990s revealed that the area was heaped with bodies, some basically piled in mass graves. Even more grisly, the excavation led to the discovery that more than 40% of the graves were fetuses, or babies under the age of 1. Researchers also discovered that bodies in the cemetery had come into contact with a number of diseases including smallpox, tuberculosis and Paget’s disease.  VIA ATLAS OBSURA

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Via THE CROSS BONES WEBSITE: 

The graveyard was vacant land for the best part of a century. Then, in the 1990s, London Underground built an electricity sub-station for the Jubilee Line Extension. Prior to the work, Museum of London archaeologists conducted a partial excavation, removing some 148 skeletons. By their own estimate, these represented: ‘less than 1% of the total number of burials that were made at this site.’ One specific skull was found that was diseased with syphilis.  Subsequent forensic tests revealed that the woman was 4ft 7in tall, aged 16-19, and that the disease was already well advanced. The 2010 BBC documentary ‘Crossbones Girl’ reconstructed the quest for the identity of this young woman, most likely a child prostitute. More than 60% of the skeletons found at Cross Bones were those of children.

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Over the past decade, the iron gates in Redcross Way have been transformed into a people’s shrine, a living communal art-work. People of all faiths and none have left messages and mementoes, testifying to its power as a truly inclusive sacred place, dedicated to a vision of a shared humanity. Since 2004, an informal Friends of Cross Bones group has held a 7pm vigil at the gates in Redcross Way on the 23rd day of each month. People come from all walks of life to ‘remember the outcast’ and to replenish the spontaneous shrine with fresh flowers and other tokens. The Cross Bones shrine is especially relevant to ‘outsiders’, though it speaks to a much wider group of supporters. People of all faiths and none, local residents and international visitors regularly gather for the monthly vigils to participate in a truly inclusive act of respect and remembrance.

The shrine at the gates already attracts over 50,000 visitors a year; it features in many guidebooks, on guided tours and in television coverage of the vigils held by local people.

 

Five Fantastic TED Talks on Death

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Life that doesn’t end with death:  In Tana Toraja, weddings and births aren’t the social gatherings that knit society together. In this part of Indonesia, big, raucous funerals form the center of social life. Anthropologist Kelli Swazey takes a look at this culture, in which the bodies of dead relatives are cared for even years after they have passed. While it sounds strange to Western sensibilities, she says, this could actually be a truer reflection of the fact that relationships with loved ones don’t simply end when breathing does. 

Let’s talk about dying: We can’t control if we’ll die, but we can “occupy death,” in the words of Peter Saul, an emergency doctor. He asks us to think about the end of our lives — and to question against the modern model of slow, intubated death in hospital. Two big questions can you help start this tough conversation.

We need a heroic narrative for death: Amanda Bennett and her husband were passionate and full of life all throughout their lives together — and up until the final days, too. Bennett gives a sweet yet powerful talk on why, for the loved ones of the dying, having hope for a happy ending shouldn’t warrant a diagnosis of “denial.” She calls for a more heroic narrative for death — to match the ones we have in life.

The 4 stories we tell ourselves about death:  Philosopher Stephen Cave begins with a dark but compelling question: When did you first realize you were going to die? And even more interesting: Why do we humans so often resist the inevitability of death? Cave explores four narratives — common across civilizations — that we tell ourselves “in order to help us manage the terror of death.”

Prepare for a good end of life:  Thinking about death is frightening, but planning ahead is practical and leaves more room for peace of mind in our final days. In a solemn, thoughtful talk, Judy MacDonald Johnston shares 5 practices for planning for a good end of life.

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