Caleb Wilde
(218 comments, 980 posts)
Posts by Caleb Wilde
The 20 Most Inappropriate Funeral Songs
The iPod’s plugged into the sound system. The crowd that has gathered for the funeral settles down into their chairs for the solemn event that’s about to take place. The sound guy hits “play” on the iPod and mistakenly plays the wrong song. It happens. And when it does, it’s often a song that either elicits laughter or utter disdain.
Here’s a list of songs that might cause laughter or disdain at a funeral if they accidently got some play time.
(PREFACE: As a rule, I’m keeping the songs “PG” because pretty much any song that’s “PG-13″ish and/or “R” could make this list)
One. “Staying Alive.” Fun fact: “Staying Alive” has roughly 100 beats per minute. This is the same rhythm used for CPR compressions, so CPR classes often use Stayin’ Alive to teach CPR.
Two. “Waiting for the Worms to Come” by PInk Floyd.
Three. Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust.”
Four. “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor
Five. Pretty much anything in the techno/dance genre.
Six. Vanilla Ice – Ice Ice Baby.
Seven. “I’m Alive” by Don Fardon
Eight. The Tetris theme song as the casket is being lowered into the grave.
Nine. Man in the Box – Alice in Chains.
Ten. Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead.
Eleven. Highway to hell.
Twelve. Johnny Cash’s “Burning Ring of Fire” while cremation is taking place.
Thirteen. More for the cremation playlist: The Trammps – “Disco Inferno”
Fourteen. Michael Jackson – “Thriller”, prompting all in attendance to quietly hope the corpse gets up and does the dance.
Fifteen: Cannibal Corpse. “Born in a Casket”. The name of this band and the name of this song is not nearly as frightening as the vocals.
Sixteen: YMCA.
Seventeen: Monty Python’s – Always look on the bright side of Life
Eighteen: “When you’re happy and you know it clap your hands”
Nineteen: Everybody Dance Now
Twenty: “Never Gonna Give You Up” by Rick Astley. What would make this especially epic is if this song was played and the “deceased” jumps out of his or her casket and yells, “You’ve all been Rick Rolled.” Epic. Best Rick Roll eva.
There’s got to be more …
At What Age Will You Die? Find out the exact age of your death (it’s totally scientific…).
This test is an utter and complete insult to your intelligence … but it’s kinda fun.
Death (and life) Unite Us All: A Video of a Father Being United with His Presumed Dead Son
When we embrace death, we embrace that part of humanity that we all share. We all share in connection, we all share in mortality and we all share in grief. Death, in separating us from loved ones, binds together those that remain in community and love.
It binds together the world in sorrow. Despite our religious, ideological views; despite our political borders and national heritage; despite the color of our skin, our sexual identity; despite the fact that we our different in so many ways, in our language, in our financial status, all of us will die. And all of us will experience the death of those we love.
If there’s a starting point in which we can find ways to tolerate and embrace one another in our differences, that starting point just might be death.
So, this video displays that. You’re probably not Syrian. You’re probably not Muslim. But you, like the father in this video, you love. And, like this father, if you thought your son had died from bombing only to find that he is indeed alive, you too would display everything you are in the fullness of your humanity.
12 of the Worst Things that Have Been Said at a Funeral
These stories were compiled by Reddit users. If you’re not familiar with Reddit, it’s kind of like Facebook except its users are generally anonymous and you can pretty much post anything you want. And you can comment on a thread even if you’re not friends with the original poster.
Also, if you’re sensitive to curse words and sexual innuendos, you may not want to read this post.
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