Archive for year 2014

A mother added this sand to her sons grave, so that his brother could play with him when they visit.

 

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A grieving Florida mom has added a sand box to her newborn baby’s grave so his older brother can spend time with him.

Ashlee Hammac, 24, from Lake City, was left devastated when tiny Ryan Michael Jolley died just five days after being welcomed into the world.

The infant passed away on Oct. 16 from hypoxic-ischemic encephalopathy — after complications during his birth led to a lack of oxygen to his brain.

Pondering how best to remember her tragic tot’s death and help his 3-year-old brother Tucker grieve, she decided to turn his black-granite memorial slab into a play area.

“He always wanted to play in that dirt around the grave,” Hammac told the Daily News on Friday. “I want to have a happy memory of it — not just memories of crying. I wanted him to have a happy memory of it, too, not just of me crying.”

Read more and see more photos HERE

 

This is a “euthanasia kit”. How does this picture make you feel?

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AFP Photo / EtieAFP Photo / Etienne Ansottenne Ansotte

 

Eight Thoughts on my HATE / LIKE Relationship with Corporate Run Funeral Homes

 

If you aren’t aware of the corporate monsters in the funeral business, let me introduce you to Service Corporation International (SCI, also known as “Dignity” funeral homes and cemeteries).  SCI is “based in Houston and publicly traded on the New York Stock Exchange (NYX), it operates more than 1,800 funeral homes and cemeteries in the U.S. and Canada. It has 20,000 employees and a market capitalization of $4 billion” (Paul M. Barrett).  SCI is in a ongoing exchange with the Federal Trade Commision in an attempt to aquire Stewart Enterprises, the second largest funeral corporation; a deal that would effectively give SCI an additional 400 locations, and — what many argue — a violation of federal antitrust laws.  

 

Just to be clear, I — like most independent funeral directors — don’t like corporate run funeral homes.  I think they’re bad for consumers and they hurt the already injured public perception of the funeral industry by perpetuating the money-hungry mortician stereotype.

But, I want to be fair in my treatment of corporate run funeral homes.  Here are four reasons I hate them and four reasons I like them.

FOUR REASONS I LIKE THEM: 

One.  New blood in the business

One of the greatest benefits that comes out of Corporate Funeral Homes is that they give first generation funeral directors an opportunity to enter and shine in the funeral industry.  If you’re entering the funeral industry, corporate is a great place to find a job in an otherwise difficult market of family businesses that tend to only hire from within.

I know that many of you reading this post right now work at corporate funeral homes and I just want to say that the funeral industry needs you.  You bring fresh perspective, hard work and heart to this trade.  Perhaps the greatest testimony to your ability and talents is this:  theoretically, a corporately run funeral home shouldn’t work.  A “machine” shouldn’t be able to serve people in their most human experience.  But, it does — to a degree — work.  And the only reason it works is because the saving grace of corporate funeral homes is because of YOUR dedication.

Two.  Pay.

Many say that corporate tends to pay their employees better than independent funeral homes.

Three. The Hours.

Independent funeral homes aren’t always managed well.  For about seven years of my life, I was on call 24/7 except for two days out of the month.  That’s right.  I got two days off a month.  There were times when I’d work 21 days straight, and I was on call for 24 hours of each of those days.  No time for a personal life.  No time for a vacation.

Corporate tends to be better run, having shifts and more days off for the staff.

Four.  Vertical Movement.

Climbing the management ladder at an independent funeral home is difficult if not impossible.  Like working for any family run business, the children of the owners always take precedence.  You can work at a funeral home for 50 years and you’re still not able to earn the job that the owner’s 25 year old son is given.  It sucks.  And corporate is a great place to reward those who work the hardest.

FOUR REASONS I HATE THEM:

One. Some businesses are meant to be small.

Our family has served the Parkesburg and surrounding communities for over 150 years.  We know our people.  We grew up here.  We shop here.  We go to church here.  If we did something wrong, it’d be in the newspaper the day before we did it.  Our roots go deep.  Heck, we’re related to half the local population.

If you take that heritage away and the interconnectedness we share with this community, you take away a key part in our ability to serve Parkesburg.  Some businesses are meant to be small.  Some businesses are meant to be local.  Like a herd of cows trouncing through a garden, corporate funeral homes in a small community can end up doing more harm than good.

Two.  Macro over micro economies

Most corporate funeral homes have some degree of price standardization.  This is all well and good, except with those price standards have been determined in wealthier areas of the country.  When a corporate funeral home focuses on macro economies you have big city price setting that gauges the small towns.

Three.  Money over service.

Back in 1993, Robert Waltrip (Chairman of the Board of Service Corporation International [SCI], which owns more than 2,100 locations) stated that people who don’t buy his company’s stock “just don’t like money.”  When you go corporate, money and satisfying your stock holders are your bottom-line.

This monetary bottom-line is what produces the upselling, the “salesman” mentality and the overpriced merchandise.  And this – this corporate need to satisfy the stock holder – perpetuates the public opinion that funeral directors are just a bunch of greedy sticklers.

“An SCI funeral cost 42 percent more than a funeral at an independently owned funeral home.”

And this one, “Seventy-three of the priciest 100 (funeral homes) in the U.S. are owned by SCI.” (VIA Paul M. Barrett)

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That’s a problem.

Four.  The Insatiable Corporate Hunger to GROW

Death is one of the must human experiences.  And it needs to be served with the most of human of professions.  Corporate, by definition, is a non human entity.  It’s very unhuman … robotic … machanical … and alien.  The mixing of a corporate entity and the most human of experiences is as dangerous as unleashing Godzilla into a city.  The only saving grace — as I mentioned previously — is that these funeral home monsters hire wonderful people.  And if it wasn’t for these people, the damage would be even worse.

Our funeral home is content with who we are.  We have no desire to buy another location; nor do we want to put our competitors out of business.  We make a respectful and honest living and we’re happy with it.

Corporate, though, is — like a monster — never happy.  There’s always a desire to grow … always a desire to buy up another family owned funeral home.  Think Wal-Mart.  Sometimes growth – especially the growth of a monster – is a bad thing.

10 Personalized Funerals

 One.

Over 100 cyclists show up for a cyclists’ funeral.

100 Cyclists at funeral

 

Two.

An Ohio man’s family is fulfilling his dying wish — to be buried astride his beloved Harley-Davidson motorcycle encased in a see-through casket.

But it hasn’t been easy. The project required an extra-large cemetery plot to accommodate a Plexiglas casket for Billy Standley and his hulking custom-painted 1967 Electra Glide cruiser. Five embalmers worked to prepare his body with a metal back brace and straps to ensure he’ll never lose his seat.  Via ABCNews (article no longer online)

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Three.

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Four:  

Members of Heroes4Higher serve as pallbearers for the funeral of 4-year-old Gabe Lyall who they visited during his battle with cancer.

Gabe Lyall was diagnosed with hepatoblastoma, a rare liver cancer found in children, on March 24, 2012, his mother Erina Lyall said. 

After four rounds of chemotherapy including a clinical trial in Morgantown, the cancer metastasized, giving Gabe just months to live, but never breaking his spirit.

Erina said that each day Gabe woke up, he requested to be addressed as a particular superhero for the day.

“Gabe felt safe among the superheroes of Heroes4Higher. When they came to visit him, he didn’t feel like a sick child. He felt like he was saving the world along with them. He saved a lot of people.”

Via http://www.wchstv.com/newsroom/eyewitness/131115_20806.shtml

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Five:

A 26,000 piece custom-designed Lego casket that was made for young Dylan Frick’s funeral.

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Six:

Four-year-old Jack Robinson of England passed away on April from an inoperable brain tumor received his final request earlier this month: a Star Wars-themed funeral.

 

 

Seven:

A kayaker’s funeral.
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Eight:

A promise fulfilled
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Nine:

A runner’s funeral.
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Ten:

A fisherman’s funeral.  WLs0MTG

The man. The myth. The legend. And his epic obituary.

 

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